Sunday, June 15, 2014

Target Trips Are Better With Toddlers

A little taste of the crazy!
Let me start out by saying that if I was reading my post title aloud it would be said with loads of sarcasm. After Mommy & Me class one day last week I decided to take a trip to Target with my darling two year old. I had a few groceries and Father's Day cards to pick up. She loves Target so I figured it would be a fun little trip.

We pull up and at this point I really got to pee. I tell Liv I have to use the bathroom and then we will get pizza from the small Pizza Hut inside because she asked. She insists on walking and promises to go in shopping cart after we eat. Okay, no problem. Except I REAAALLY have to pee and she is walking about as fast as a snail and as we go she is saying or should I say shouting "Mommy, you have to pee?!" and "Mommy has to go potty?!" Everyone is giggling as they pass us. Good thing I didn't need to do number two.

Bathroom trip accomplished. On to food. We get our little pizza to share and I open the juice fridge for her to pick out her drink and of course she picks out the most expensive juice in the hello kitty cup. I know she won't even like that particular juice and just gets it for Hello Kitty but there is a line behind us and instead of causing a scene I decided to choose my battles and the battle that would be sure to follow isn't worth the $4 drink. So I just oblige.

Lunch went smoothly and then it was time to grab a cart and go shopping. Surprise, surprise she doesn't want to go in the cart. I said okay but told her she had to hold my hand. That lasted about all of two minutes until she was like: "Mama..I walk by myself." I said "Okay but you have to stay with me." Of course in her sweet little voice she says "Okay mommy."

She slowly followed me for a while, being good except for the fact that it was taking FOREVER to get through the store. Then we got to the seasonal department and she was intrigued by the outdoor toys. I tried to keep her moving along and she kept saying "just give me one more second mama." I did give her 30 seconds or so the first few times she did this but it was always "just one more second."

I tried bribing her with snacks to get her in the cart but she wasn't having that this trip. Nope, she just insisted on strolling along and putting the strangest items for a toddler in our cart. I tried to dump them secretly as we went along but all of a sudden she would remember the tupperware she put in the cart 5 aisles ago and want to hold it and i would need to pretend I didn't know what happened to it.

After about an hour in the store my patience was running thin. She refused to move on to the next area of the store I needed to go to. So I physically had to pick her up as she screamed "Don't take me!" "Don't put me in YOUR cart!" "Ahhh! Ahhh! Leave me!" I am pretty sure everyone passing by thought I was abducting her. I pushed her along as she screamed and sobbed and getting disgusted looks from strangers like get control of your child. Wish it was that easy people, wish it was that easy.

I told her that if she didn't knock it off, she would need to go in time out when we got home and then she started screaming: "Don't punish me! Don't!" So if they didn't think I was abducting her, they definitely though I was beating her. I am now that person, the person I used to look at in disgust with the out of control child.

After almost two hours in Target and $200 later, I come home at my wits end and without the cat food I initially needed. Good times...Good times....


  1. Ohhh... I've been there. Definitely good times! Did you have to buy the Tupperware?!

  2. "Don't put me in your cart!" Hahaha sooooo funny - as a non-parent, it's one of those things I would hear and wonder how to take - is that child being kidnapped or just in a mood?

  3. Oh my goodness. Lord please give me patience when I have children, plleeeassee! How many things did you forget at Target?

  4. Bahahahahah! This is why I can't have kids... a peaceful Target trip is more important to me. ;P